I think I am in need of a reality check!?

So I have been married for almost 2 years and I have 2 kids...one with my husband and one not. While I was pregnant with our daughter things really just went south for us. I mean I don't really want to be with him anymore...he doesn't make me happy. My girls adore him and I have decided to stick it out because of them. I have suggested counceling but he refuses and says we will work our problems out on our own...i do not need more crap shoved in my head. I NEVER get out of the house without him unless it is to work out and that is just recent, even then I get the what were you doing crap..He doesn't trust me and always insinuates that I was doing something I wasn't supposed to be doing. I have never stepped outside our relationship or marriage. Just recently I ran into an ex from about 4 years ago or so. He just got out of a serious relation ship at the begining of the year and we got to talking. We have been in contact again for 2 weeks and I feel horrible, especially now (cont)